#HeyYou

I have always hated #metoo. The hashtag that is, not the movement. I felt it lacked the anger and power the movement deserved. I wanted it to be called #heyyou. Well actually, I wanted it to be called #oiyoufuckers but #heyyou seemed more PG rated. The problem I have with #metoo is that, to me,... Continue Reading →

The Ex-Boozer Chronicles

I was a complete boozer. Someone once referred to me as 'the booziest person I know'. That's how boozy I was. I was horrified when it happened, of course. I didn't want to be defined as the biggest boozer in Brisbane. It's not an endearing title like 'the most unpunctual person I know' (which I... Continue Reading →

I’ve Seen a Rock Before…

We had an hour until check out time. Giant was packing his bag with army precision, swiftly folding tops and placing them neatly in his bag. I was laying on the crumpled bed messaging a friend, and had managed to move my gear into a relatively ordered pile to sort through at some point. ‘I... Continue Reading →

A Mystifying Massage in Sri Lanka

He sat directly opposite us, his shirtless and sarong-ed figure on display as if we were viewing some sort of Ron Mueck sculpture. His belly was bloated like a man who needed to get his stomach drained after years of alcohol abuse, and his breasts laid on top like two pancakes resting on a basketball,... Continue Reading →

The Great Darwin Croc Hunt

One morning in August 2016 I was sitting at my desk at work, and I thought to myself 'f**k this s**t, I need a holiday!' (okay, I think this most days but I only occasionally act on it). I’d recently broke up with someone, and wanted to escape for a few days/forever/into a giant hole... Continue Reading →

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